Shouty, half-dressed rakish degenerate Jim Jordan continues to publicly embarrass himself with his half-assed hearings about—’what was that, again? Beneath all the grievance bubble-babble, foxspeak, dogwhistling and catcalling it’s hard to make out what they are actually on about. With all the expensive tax-dollar time they are wasting on the [ahem] ‘hearings’, ominously dubbed the Weaponization of the Federal Government— here I must add, the Party has discovered a new hotbutton word in ‘weaponization’ [see: ‘woke’] and when that happens, like a puppy with your new loafers, they have to chew and growl and obsess on it until it’s reduced to useless rubble.
Anyways, these sh*t charades /hearings must be a matter of utmost importance— surpassing the looming financial ruin of a US debt default for instance, crucial to our survival, right?
Well, um. No matter what the Party says they are about, they always circle back to Hunter Biden’s laptop, a mythical box allegedly containing Very Important Information, and possibly the Secrets of the Universe. I have concluded it must actually be the Ark of the Covenant, because surely only that would justify pushing aside all other pressing matters, like what will happen to those poor people in Ohio exposed to horribly toxic chemicals caused by the train wreck of Republican deregulation?
But Jimmy toggles back and forth between the mythical laptop [have you ever seen a picture of it? Could anyone describe what is looks like or where it came from or who possesses it?] and other weighty matters, like — twitter? How often does anyone in your household wake up at night worrying about what’s happening on twitter?
And interestingly, Rep. Jordan [who ostensibly represents the state of Ohio in the US Congress] has failed to show up at the East Palestine site of the biggest rail disaster in Ohio history. The CEO of the toxic train company, Norfolk Southern, at least said he was ‘sorry’. Jimmy Jordan hasn’t done sh*t.
From a Cincinnatti op-ed—“The East Palestine community is suffering. Imagine the questions and concerns that torment residents. Now imagine those same traumatized Ohioans being exploited by political opportunists to own the libs and stoke racial division. A new low even for MAGA politicians and their right-wing media shills.
They didn’t travel to the Ohio/Pennsylvania border to help residents under extreme duress. They came to harangue Democratic leadership and score political points off a tragedy. They prefer performance to policymaking.
Meanwhile, the actual work of fixing what went wrong in a railroad town paying dearly for cut corners and runaway profits goes on. Federal and state officials are coordinating cleanup operations and vowing to hold Norfolk Southern accountable. The Biden administration and Secretary of Transportation pledge to reinstate safety protections scrapped by Trump, as well as EPA powers to rapidly contain spills.
The question is will MAGA Republicans commit to pragmatic legislation to address the 1,000 train derailments every year (there’ve been three since Ohio’s) or just continue to make a mockery of East Palestine’s misery with pointless posturing? Will they investigate broken or defective railroads and scream for resolution or revert to theatrics? Jordan just launched an investigation into Buttigieg. There’s your answer.”
Republican Conference Chair Elise “Crazy” Stefanik (R-N.Y.)—a devotee of the “great replacement” theory that inspired an 18-year-old who killed 10 while targeting Black people at a supermarket in her native Buffalo—said in a statement:
“There is absolutely no question that Jim Jordan is one of the strongest Members of this generation when it comes to effective and aggressive oversight —he is like an oversight coach to so many members and I couldn’t be prouder to work with him every day.”
Oopsie, unfortunate metaphor. It is very lucky that MAGAtized gopers have never heard of Freud—they are always slipping all over their festering subconcious sexual kinks. Because if you recall, what Jim Jordan is famous for is the Scandal— that as assistant wrestling coach at Ohio State University from 1987 to 1995, he was accused of knowing of, and doing nothing, about the serial sexual assault of students. A half dozen students came forward to testify and he tried to silence them. But don’t take my word—see for yourself what people in his own state think of him:
https://www.jordanscandal.com/
And now, he is holding hearings [and asking for $17 million dollars to continue them] about twitter and hunter biden’s laptop— which I would guess most people in his state don’t know, or give a crap about. But IMAGINE what the victims of the East Palestine disaster could do with that $17 MILLION dollars, to repair their shattered homes and lives.
But instead, once again, Jimmy Jordan is blowing it — BIG TIME.